I have never written a poem before

I have never written a poem before

Postby DaisyB » Fri May 20, 2005 8:28 pm

I was so bored at work this afternoon, waiting for some job cards from the workshop that I started doodling, then I imagined two elderly ladies chatting at a garden gate and before I knew it I was writing a poem. The last time I wrote a poem was a forced effort at school.

So what do you think of my effort? I think Andrew Motion is quite safe. :lol:


Garden Gate Gossip

“My Dear, I do beg your pardon
Just what is that plant in your garden?
It’s such is a beautiful red
In the corner of that bed”
“That’s ‘Geum, Mrs Bradshaw’ Lady Marden”


“I do think your lilac’s sublime,
Looks good growing next to the lime,
Well no time to chat
Must go feed the cat
I’ll catch you again here sometime”


“Yes, next time I’ll make us some tea
Come round about half past three
We’ll sit in the sun
Have an éclair or a bun,
How about Friday, will you be free?”


“Well, you’re really too kind Mrs Bate
Much better than chat over the gate
His Lordship’ll be out
Fishing for trout
So Friday it is, that’s a date”

I have more to add to this, I have a couple of verses already jotted down, but hope to make it a complete story. Be as critical as you like, please. :lol:
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Postby dejavou » Fri May 20, 2005 8:49 pm

That's very good Daisy, I'm looking forward to the next bit :)
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Postby Granny Eve » Sat May 21, 2005 1:27 am

I love it Daisy - please send more.
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Postby ciderman_nz » Sat May 21, 2005 2:18 am

I liked that Daisy! You've been hiding your talents all this time!
I always think if it makes you form a picture in your mind it's succeeded. Not even only a visual picture sometimes a mental picture of the people involved. This does the latter. Well done.
Michael
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Postby Maywalk » Sat May 21, 2005 7:11 am

I loved it Daisy,
Its telling a story of two ladies meeting for the first time and I am agog to read the rest.
Brilliant.

Your a poet and dont know it :shock:

MORE, MORE, MORE. :D :D :D

Maisie.
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Postby Rowan » Sat May 21, 2005 7:59 am

Well done Daisy - keep going. I like the idea of a poem putting a picture in your mind.
Avoid the evil, and it will avoid thee.
Gaelic Proverb

Ad eundum quo nemo ante iit.
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Postby DaisyB » Sun May 22, 2005 2:46 pm

Well Folks, here is the finished poem. Having never tried writing poetry before I am quite pleased with myself, am I allowed. :lol:


Garden Gate Gossip


“My Dear, I do beg your pardon
Just what is that plant in your garden?
It’s such a beautiful red
In the corner of that bed”
“That’s ‘Geum, Mrs Bradshaw’ Lady Marden”

“I do think your lilac’s sublime,
Looks good growing next to the lime,
Well no time to chat
Must go feed the cat
I’ll catch you again here sometime”

“Yes, next time I’ll make us some tea
Come round about half past three
We’ll sit in the sun
Have an éclair or a bun,
How about Friday, will you be free?”

“Well, you’re really too kind Mrs Bate
Much better than chat over the gate
His Lordship’ll be out
Fishing for trout
So Friday it is, that’s a date”

Friday dawned bright, warm and sunny,
Mrs Bate thought it really quite funny
That her little garden
Should attract lady Marden
Her up to her eyeballs in money.

At three the oven timer was pinging
Molly Bate was happily singing
The cakes were all made
And the table was laid
Then the phone started urgently ringing

“My Dear, I hope you don’t mind
A dog sitter I couldn’t find
May I bring Daniel
My little spaniel?
Oh, I can, you are ever so kind”

So they lazily sat in the garden
Molly Bate and sweet Sally Marden
With the dog at their feet
It was such a treat
The cement in their friendship did harden.

They chatted about their long lives
Both having been honest wives
Molly widowed by war
Which left her quite poor
That was why she kept bees in two hives.

She grew lavender, thyme and red clover
That the bees loved and hovered over
She sold much of the honey
(To bring in some money)
At the farmers market just outside Dover.

Sally met her dear husband on a train
He, on his way back to the Front again
She was a W.R.E.N
And didn’t know then
He’d ‘bump’ into her next day in the rain.

They married soon after war had ended
In the country they’d fiercely defended
They were blessed with one child
A daughter, pretty but wild,
On a governess’s help they depended.

Now the sun was beginning to set
And these ladies, so glad to have met
Bade each other goodnight
In the last of the light
They’ll be friends forever, you bet.

By J M Churchill
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Postby Maywalk » Sun May 22, 2005 2:58 pm

It was GREAT June. I REALlY liked that.

It just shows you what you can do when you put your mind to it. :D

Did you enjoy doing it?

What if I asked you to write one about night fall.
Do you think you could write a few lines around that.?
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Postby Rowan » Sun May 22, 2005 3:02 pm

Excellent Daisy, I do envy you all with your creativity.
Avoid the evil, and it will avoid thee.
Gaelic Proverb

Ad eundum quo nemo ante iit.
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Postby DaisyB » Sun May 22, 2005 3:20 pm

I didn't know I had any Rowan, at least not literary.
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Postby DaisyB » Sun May 22, 2005 3:21 pm

I didn't know I had any Rowan, at least not literary creativity.
Thank you Maisie, I will try, it might take a few days.
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Postby Maywalk » Sun May 22, 2005 3:22 pm

Everyone has it June but it needs bringing to the fore. :D :D
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Postby Orchidea » Sun May 22, 2005 4:58 pm

That is excellant Daisy, I would so love to be able to write poetry that way, as in a story....wonderful!
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Postby DaisyB » Sun May 22, 2005 5:38 pm

Thank you Orchidea, I'm still amazed that I did it.
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Postby dejavou » Sun May 22, 2005 6:02 pm

That's really good Daisy .... well done :lol:
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