Tombstone Epitaphs.

[Maywalk]

Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York:


Born 1903 - Died 1942

Looked up the elevator shaft
to see if the car was on the way down.
It was.


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In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery:


Here lies an Atheist
All dressed up
And no place to go.


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On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:


Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102.
The Good Die Young.


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In a London, England cemetery:


Here lies Ann Mann,
Who lived an old maid
But died an old Mann.
Dec. 8, 1767


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In a Ribbesford, England,cemetery:


Anna Wallace:
The children of Israel wanted bread,
And the Lord sent them manna.
Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.


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In a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:


Here lies Johnny Yeast..
Pardon me
For not rising.


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In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania, cemetery:


Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas
Instead of the brake.


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In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:


Here lays The Kid.
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger
But slow on the draw.


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A lawyer's epitaph in England:


Sir John Strange.
Here lies an honest lawyer,
And that is Strange.


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John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery:


Reader, if cash thou art In want of any,
Dig 6 feet deep; And thou wilt find a Penny.


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In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England:


On the 22nd of June,
Jonathan Fiddle Went out of tune.


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Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls, Vermont:


Here lies the body of our Anna -
Done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,
But the skin of the thing that made her go.


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On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket, Massachusetts:


Under the sod and under the trees,
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease..
He is not there, there's only the pod.
Pease shelled out and went to God.


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In a cemetery in England:


Remember man,as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I.
As I am now,so shall you be.
Remember this and follow me.


To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:


To follow you I'll not consent
Until I know which way you went.

[Polter60]

You've got to laugh. Spike Milligan wanted 'I told you I was ill' on his tombstone, apparently the council wouldn't allow it for whatever reason. So they wrote it in Gaelic.

[Rowan]

Good ones!!

[Penny]

Very good ones Maisie. cheers Penny